Mangalore Trip

2007 has come with great beginnings. I got married on January 1, 2007 in Mumbai. It was a traditional Magalorian wedding. It was an AWESOME experience - the flowers in my hair, the typical way of dressing,the jewelry and the rituals - very different from a Sindhi wedding!

Day1:
A few days after the wedding, my husband (Abhi) , my mother-in law and myself set off to attend a wedding in Mangalore. Mangalore is Abhi's native place - the place where he has spent his zillion summer holidays!

We landed in Mangalore around 3:30 pm 6th Jan. Shanti chikki had come to pick us up. We decided to skip lunch since we had already eaten on the plane. Mangalore made a great first time impression on me...it was lush green..with coconut trees and fields all around. I wouldn't call it a village nor a city. It was something in the middle- maybe like a small town. The roads were narrow but clean and less crowded than mumbai. The first place we went to was the family temple. This temple was opened in 2002 by the Shetty family. The temple was almost a 45 minute drive from the airport. The place was very quiet and I could hear the birds chirping. The temple was closed, but when you go with the owners...what do you expect!!! My mother in law (from now on I shall call her Mami. In tulu, one would call his/her mother in law as Mami) started giving us a tour of the entire temple. There was a small gate in the center with God's statue inside and then there were 4 small 'mandirs' around it. It was just soo peaceful. We saw the temple caretaker coming and he spoke to Mami in tulu. I felt at peace and very honored to be at the family temple as the first next generation daughter in law..sounds wierd haaan!

Just behind the temple was Swami Doda's house. Abhi calls her Swami Doda because she used to teach him prayers when he was younger. She was a short sweet lady and spoke very fast. She was very insistent that we have lime juice . She was giving Shanti chikki directions to make the lime juice. Swami Doda lives by herself, cooks by herself and takes care of the family temple. She was a fearless woman with a firm belief that GOD is always there with her to protect her. It was awesome to meet such a courageous lady.

We then set off from there to the Nittai family home. This home is 300 years old...yes you heard it right 300 YEARS! OMG..I was amazed. This house was like a palace with wooden walls and short ceilings. We entered from the side and yes Doda shouted and told us to enter from the front. Abhi and I stood on one of the steps of the house and (?)Doda came and put water on our feet, took an aarti thali over our heads and then allowed us to enter. It was a gret feeling to be in th Nitai house. the ceilings were low and red. That place brought back very fond memories for Mami. She was telling us how they used to play in the courtyard when they were younger. There used to be no electricity those days and the house used to be very dark. In the temple room, there was a picture of the founder of the Nitai household. We all prayed there. Then we went to the back where mami showed us the huge metal "handi" that used to be filled with water and get hot from the burning coal(?). She was full of excitement while narrating her childhood events to us. Then we sat there for a while and had hot milk in a silver glass. That is the ritual in Bunts when a newly wed couple comes home. Well, this was just the beginning...hot milk in a silver glasss was the highlight of our trip! We were sitting there watching (?) wedding pictures and left after a while.

The next stop was the Nitai temple. This temple had steps going down..that was peculiar about this temple. We took some pictures here and hurriedly left for Dimpi's mehendi. We were running very late. It was 6:30 already.. we decided to go to her mehendi directly and get ready at Ballu tithi's house( the venue of the function). Varun kept calling Shanti Chikki asking for money...hehe..that was funny..he wanted to take us to a club that night!It was nice to chat with Shanti chikki in the car. I realised that she could multi task very well. She was a home maker as well as had her own business and she seemed to have a good balance between both these lives. We finally reached Ballu tithi's house at around 8 pm.

Ballu tithi and Mamta chikki's house is beautiful. It felt like a minister's house. We were given a very warm welcome . Mamta chikki washed our feet and then did the Aarti. We entered the house and were made to sit down and drink some hot milk from a silver glass...I was very nervous. There were so many people around us and we seemed to be the center of attraction. It felt kinda nice actually ..hehe. I was thrilled to see Abhi's cousins again. They are very sweet and I love them all. Saakshi,Drithi,Vishaan,Rushabh,Anukta,Shashank,Vidut and Varun were there with me the whole time. We quickly changed and went to the garden in front of the bunglow..where everybody was sitting. Dimpi was sitting there with her mom. Ah! I remembered myself in her shoes just 7 days ago.. Jairaj tithi was dancing away to the Dj's music. ..he seemed to be having fun in his own dancing world.

Sampat Mama's elder brother stole the show after that. He was cracking jokes in tulu and his expressions were hilarious. He had a very cheering crowd enjoying every minute of his jokes session. After that Sampat Mama sang old hindi songs and boy! he had such a fine voice! He had made a CD of his songs and the DJ played that. The party had just started..the numbers got faster and the dance floor started getting more crowded. jairaj tithi was running the show..announcing on the mike and making people dance. Well, that meant the newly weds had to dance too. Abhi and I danced to the number "Jab koi batt bigad jaaye"..it was soo romantic. Mami got mehendi put on her hands. I got to meet Abhi's second cousins there..some of them who couldn't make it to the wedding. Also, ofcourse I met Anushka for the first time..she couldn't attend our wedding because of exams. Finally it was time to eat and guess what..there was Bombay Chaat! Mami,Abhi and I were on the dancing floor from then on. Abhi and I kept pulling Hamsa tithi,Veena chikki, Ravi tithi and Saritha chikki to the dance floor. It was a lot of fun dancing with all of them. There was no place in my stomach for dinner...I stuck to Ganji-Chutney..hehe. Finally we all wound up for the day at around midnight. I was very very tired. Shashank came to drop us at Amma's place. He had gone to Sakleshpur and it took him almost 4 hours to get back! The plan was to be at the wedding venue the next morning by 10:30 am. Lets call it a day folks!

Day 2:
Day 2 started at 7:45 am. I was very nervous since I was going to wear a saree. I could hear Amma talking to her maid about getting breakfast ready. Veena chikki arrived at around 9 to help with the saree draping. She is very sweet and chirpy at ANY time of the day. She and Mami started draping the saree for me. They did a wonderful job of draping the saree..it was much more comfortable than my own wedding day! We all were ready by 9:45 am and at the wedding location before 10:30 am. Now thats called punctuality!!!! Some of Abhi's cousins were already there. All the girls look very pretty in sarees holding thali with flowers and rice. We were waiting at the entrance in a line waiting for the bride and groom to arrive. As soon as I heard the trumpets, I knew they had arrived. We could see them slowly work towards the mandap. After the wedding party had arrived, they were led to the stage and the ceremony began. At this point, we were just sitting in the audience overlooking the rituals...which I knew by first hand experience! The groom's side cousins looked like they had taken an oath not to part with the groom's chappals. It was tough to get chappals from them. One lady even told me she would remove my saree if I pulled too much..phew!

After the ceremony, we all went to eat. This is one of most my memorable experiences. So, the lunch was served in a leaf. First they give you the leaf and you are supposed to sprinkle water on the leaf and clean it. Then they bring out all the dishes one by one and give you some of it in the leaf. This was the first time I ate with my hands in public...never done that before! The best part about wearing a saree is that if you overeat which I did.it doesn't show since the pallu covers the stomach...haha.

After we finished eating, we left the marriage venue and went to Doda's sister's house. It wasn't too far away. Doda's sister looks soo much like her..well duh!..obviously they are sisters! The apple shake we had there was very good! After around 45 minutes we left for Ravi tithi and Saritha chikki's place. It was fun spending time with them. We were going through pictures...really really old pictures of the family, wedding pictures, Mami's wedding pictures...Mami was just 46/48 kgs when she got married!!! We had hot milk in a silver glass first and then had litchi juice. Ravi tithi and Saritha chikki were explaining the pictures to us and telling us about Saritha chikki's offer from Infosys and her computer skills..in her times wow! There were some pictures of Abhi's Nana with his friends and they were awesome. We got them from Ravi tithi and will be framing them.

The next stop was Shanti chikki and Jairaj tithi's house. They had two dogs..I was scared at first but they seem to listen to their owners...hehe. We had tea at their place..I really needed it. We were discussing how we should spend our next vacation- Kurg,Mangalore and some other beautiful places around there...Shanti chikkii had soo many ideas! After that we hopped in the car to go to Hamsa tithi and Veena chikki's place. Of course we had hot milk in a silver glass and sat there and chatted about all our marriage functions in Bombay. Veena chikki does not dance but she danced in our wedding!..it felt great to know that. Everyone had a great time in Bombay...she was saying. Veena chikki came to our rescue with saree draping...I feel so thankful everytime I think about that.

The next stop was Yati thithi and Mamta chikki's place. We could see the entire Mangalore from their terrace..it was a wonderful view. After having some hot milk in a silver glass, we checked out Dashrath's room..it was pretty cool. Mamta chikki collects antiques and one of the antiques was a doli..that was the entrance to Dashrath's room! Mami's Mama (sounds little funny) stayed in the same building and we went to his place next. They were getting ready to go to the reception. From there, we went to visit Yashoda Doda. I loved the door to her house..it was soo grand. Her house had high ceilings and huge rooms. She speaks hindi since she lived in Mumbai. She kept translating her conversation in Hindi so that I could understand.

It was already 7:30 by now and we were exhausted. We had to get ready for the reception! We rushed home and got ready. After much pondering, I decided to wear saree again and this time Mami helped me. We reached the reception ground by 9:00 pm. We went up and wished the couple and then ate dinner. After that everyone just sat togther chatting. Ravi tithi was cracking jokes and Saritha chikki was translating them for me. It was soo much fun!!!! He was telling the story of riding Mama's bike inspite of being told not to, another incident of how Mami's saree got stuck in the scooter wheel while she was going for a test. Everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves. Mami's chacha also was relating to us some funny incidents. It was nice to see the whole family come together and share their memories. We left for home at around midnight and that was the end of a very very hectic but great day in Mangalore!

Day 3:
We were flying back in the afternoon. We were ready by 9 am. First we went to visit Mami's masi. She was very happy seeing us.We had hot milk....as little as possible, sat with her and then headed off to the hospital to meet Mama's chacha. It was very nice meeting him. He was also happy that we could make it. It was 9:30 am and we headed straight to the airport. I couldn't believe that our trip was over.We were there for just 2 days - I had met soo many people..it was amazing. I couldn't believe that we were flying back to the US that night. Everything seemed to have happened very fast. I enjoyed every minute of my trip to Mangalore. At the end of the day, being with family is the most important thing. I will never forget my trip to Mangalore and surely enough this blog will never let me forget it.

Hasta for now!